This is the second time I have now been on maternity leave and I can honestly say hand on heart it’s the most wonderful time, watching my tiny boy grow, start to develop his own character and learn new skills but as the weeks pass and turn into months I come to realise that this reality, this daily life that I’m leading has A. Got to soon come to an end and B. Isn’t really reality at all it’s a sort of ‘false reality’ yes of course an essential one for my boy and me, filled with feeding, learning, baby groups and lunches out with friends hehe. But I am all too aware that this time, the life and routine that we are all leading now, is only a temporary one.
Soon I will be back at work doing what I love and my babies will be in childcare and with family.
I have never regretted going back to work, I think it is important to show the children both parents need to go and earn ‘the pennies’ but that doesn’t make it any easier to leave them. And as my eldest grew so did his independence, he needed me less and was more than happy to wave me goodbye each morning, so his day of learning and fun could begin!
But when their tiny and this whole leaving them to go and be ‘more than someones mommy’ begins again, it will be difficult I know because he will still need me, and I will still need him, we will have been inseparable for nearly 9 months, he is my tea break pal and my main conversationalist throughout the short days and long nights… And now this is where the dreaded ‘mom guilt’ will come in, and the questions marks are raised in heads.
But I know they will both be fine and quickly adjust, and then that shall become our new routine yes this will of course change from time to time as they grow and start school!! – something I’m not thinking about right now, thank you very much!
But for now it’s about getting back to ‘ the new normal’ as a family of four and doing something which is just for me where I can be ‘Amy’ for a short time and not Mommy 24/7. I am excited to see where this new chapter will take us and what adventures we will have.